Friday, May 21, 2010 . 5/21/2010 01:01:00 PM

I'm so tired. (This has somewhat become my catchphrase... Not good.)

Didn't sleep well last night (as usual), and I woke up late for school.

Turns out, less than half the class turned up for the first half of lecture. By the time practical started though, it's more like the people in the gang I hang out with are the only ones missing, other than another guy.

I'm now sitting in the library, staring at the mass of words that's coming out of my typing fingers. The finger that I accidentally cut with a razor is still throbbing. Now I know why people use razors to hurt themselves. When it cuts, the bleeding refuse to stop. I swear, I can see the bloodstain through the plaster.

Okay. That many people know who I like, so I might as well cryptically reveal who it is. Because of the lack of people in class, I kinda have a very good view from behind:)

I'm the terrible yet not-so-terrible type of crusher. I like someone a lot. I'll try my best to catch glances of that particular person. I'll try my best not to make it so obvious (it was quite good that nobody caught on until half a year later). I don't exactly stalk that particular person (this should be good, right?). I'm too shy to talk to that particular person (this is NOT good). I'll act like I don't like that person (totally NOT great AT ALL).

~Aw... Finger hurts. ~

See? Most likely, I won't even pluck up the courage to say anything (or in my generation's term, confess). First thing, I'm too shy. Second thing, I'm afraid (that's normal, right?). Third thing, I don't want to change anything between us if it doesn't work out. Fourth, I won't do it all the more when I know that particular person has someone they fancy.

Hm... this is my longest crush since the one back in secondary school. Poly really changed me. Not for the better. Okay, maybe it changed my perception of guys. And age. Agreed?